Want a threesome? Don't we all! But how do you get one? Well, that is the hard part. Before you even consider a threesome you must make communication your focus.
If you're in a relationship and you're wanting to have a third partner join the fun - then you need to discuss (freely and openly) what you'd like to do with your partner. There can't be any pressure. Enthusiastic consent is crucial.
Firstly, talk about the why. Why do you want a threesome? Does it match up? Are you bored? Want to experiment with being with someone of the same or other gender? Want to just spice things up? Make sure you're on the same page.
Talk about jealousy - play out scenarios. How will you feel if your partner spends more time with your third lover? Who will take control? Do you need to plan? What sexual activity is off the table? What are your boundaries - emotionally, physically, and morally?
When you're sure this is what you want to do - and you've decided what type of person you want to join you, it's time to start looking.
The best place to look for a third is at a Swingers Club or sex event. Usually at these clubs there will be a system - like red, green, and orange wristbands - to signal who is ready to mingle! Swingers Clubs are great because consent is already clear. And people come to these events to join in group sex. Perfect!
If a sex club isn't right for you - the best place to find a third is through an escort service. An escort does this for a job! They're absolutely the perfect partner to join a threesome. They're great at communication and can be clear about boundaries. They're used to helping people feel comfortable and turned on. Why would you go anywhere else when you can go with a professional?
Finally, you can try a dating app - but be very clear that you're after a third. You don't want to string anyone along who is looking for a relationship. Meet the person you're interested in ahead of time - in a neutral environment like a café. That way you can be clear about boundaries without pressure - either party can back out without feeling bad or weird.
When it comes to threesome night, remember: Consent! Consent! Consent! Throughout the night make sure everyone is enjoying themselves. Take things slow and go easy on the alcohol. Drunk folks cannot consent! Consider using toys to ensure everyone has a great time.
Set the mood with a sexy massage so everyone can gently begin to explore each other's bodies.
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Consider a board game to break the ice and make sure everyone is comfortable. Setting the mood is important - make sure everyone is having fun even if they're a little nervous!
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Hopefully that helps! Remember to keep things safe with condoms and lubricant and replace condoms with each new partner (the same goes for toys - wash between partners).
Remember to relax and keep the lines of communication open. Have a laugh, don't take it all too seriously. It's meant to be fun after all.
Now enjoy your ménage à trois! Just make sure the bed is big enough or move to the carpet...